Erma Bombeck was the bomb

I'm a big fan of Erma. A collection of her greatest humor columns are on my nightstand table. That's sacred ground since I'm so busy - there is VERY MINIMAL READING OF BOOKS. But, I love flipping to a random page and reading a column or two. Often, I am amused, although sometimes, I am shaking with laughter, careful not to wake up The Husband.

She wrote this after she was diagnosed with cancer, and I completely heart it:

If I had my life to live over, I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren't there for the day.
I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.
I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the 'good' living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.
I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.
I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.
I would have sat on the lawn! With my grass stains.
I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.
I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn't show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.
Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, 'Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.' There would have been more 'I love you's'; more 'I'm sorry's.'
But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute...look at it and really see it... live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!
Don't worry about who doesn't like you, who has more, or who's doing what
Instead; let's cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us not those who HATE on us

Yes. Yes. Yes.

Comments

[Lyn]

Loved, loved, LOVED Erma. I used her pieces in many of my public speaking engagements. Moms could totally relate to her. I got that even BEFORE I was a mom.

[Manic Mommy]

I read my grandmother's copy of The Grass is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank when I was probably about 11 or 12 and thought it was a riot then. I wonder how much more I'd get out of her writing now.

[rimarama]

You know I love me some Erma!

[alejna]

You know, I've never actually read anything by her. I guess I should.

[Kyla]

Perfect!