Zero ABC

One of the few episodes of Nanny 911 (or was it Supernanny?) I watched involved an issue with a child who CONTINUALLY got out of bed at night. Each time, she would have to be walked back into her room, tucked in, only to have this repeat in a never-ending cycle of parental pain. All night. I can't even remember if we had Girl yet, but I do distinctly remember thinking: PLEASELORDNO.

From that point on, I dreaded the day that this would come. It gave me mental dry heaves.

So, imagine my delight to discover that somehow, Girl came to believe ALL ON HER OWN, that she was not supposed to leave her bed once tucked in at night until we came to get her in the morning. I mean, hello! Awesomeness! Occasionally, she would resist going to bed and not want us to leave, but once we pried ourselves away, she was in. For the night. If she woke up earlier than when we came to get her around 7 am, she would read her books in bed and otherwise ENTERTAIN HERSELF. And, thus, the Golden Age of Bed Confinement (GABC) continued. The King and Queen of the Land were mighty satisfied.

The only real problem that came out of the GABC was that if there was some issue, even minor, say, her needing the fan to be turned on, turned off, socks on, socks off, wax on, wax off...she would need to summon us to her. Usually this would begin with inaudible articulations - mamamamamamama - moving to louder MamaMamaMamaMamaMama - until finally crescendoing to a MAMA!WAIL!MAMA! WAIL! cacophony of discontent. The speed at which this occurred was slightly chilling.

Yet for a long time, we tolerated this because DUDE let the GABC continue. It's better than the alternative!

The only other problem with the GABC was the dependency on The Night-time Diaper. To our defense, we figured she couldn't be possibly ready to ditch it (despite otherwise being potty-trained for 1 1/2 years) since every morning, it weighed approximately 10 pounds. Seriously. You could do bicep curls with it. However, we did not consider that it was 10 pounds because of almost 12 hours of bed confinement. Yes, well.

Meanwhile, the crying episodes were increasing. Being scared started accounting for a large percentage of cries and I was getting up sometimes several times at night to soothe her. (The Queen of the Land was far less satisfied with this turn of events, and the fact that the King always wore his royal earplugs to sleep.)

I realized, though, that we were essentially reinforcing her to cry in order to get her needs met. Which was not our original intention (that was purely selfish). So, we took a deep collective breath this week and declared the end of GABC.

We told her that she was able to get up and get us if she needed something. She could get up and go to the bathroom is she had to.  Empowering her.

Today was the 3rd day in a row she woke up with a 0 lb diaper, having gotten up 1-2 times at night to go on her own. She has not cried because of being scared. She has even turned off her own nightlight because it was "too bright." And she has been beaming with pride every morning with her night-time successes, so proud to be a big girl.

Empowering the girl. Amazing how the rest just follows. Embarassing to not have done this sooner.

Comments

[Wife and Mommy]

Dude. My eldest (5 years old) still hasn't left the GABC. Nothing we say or do can convince him that HE IS ALLOWED TO LEAVE THE BED TO GO POTTY. Don't know what to do at this point.

[MWAS]

Almost wrote my entire mothers in medicine post for the topic day about things we needed to know in med school about sleep. Sleep is like air to me - have to have it - and in med school when I could sleep anywhere, anytime - I never comprehended how important sleep would be to me in both practice and home life. It's one of the first questions I ask parents when they bring in a sick kiddo. Love the GABC! Funny how our kids never turn out how we think they're supposed to be scripted. Constantly amazed by mine!

[inthefastlane]

Jack Jack was great at GABC. And then, we told him he could leave his bed to go potty and he was still great at it. But, for the last month, he has also been great at sneaking into our bed in the middle of the night and trying to stay there, hoping we wont notice him. Sigh...

[Manic Mommy]

Good work! HRH was a BC believer for quite some time. Just this week, we introduced a little tough love on the late night visits.

Here's my question: WHY DO THEY ALWAYS COME TO MY SIDE OF THE BED?

[magpie]

Good job. Mine still climbs out of bed every night in the wee hours, and climbs in with us...but I don't even wake up.

[KC]

Gah. Spoke too soon. Queen highly dissatisfied with last night.

[rockzee]

I can't wait to see the end of the 10 lb. morning diaper. Congrats. That is a MAJOR accomplishment.

[DysdHousewife]

I guess I should feel greatly blessed to have never had bedtime issues with any of my kids. Potty training, now THAT was a different story.

[Jocelyn]

Our 5 yr old is still in the GABC. Most times this is a wonderful arrangement, until there is crying in the middle of the night or the "mom, mom,MOM! I gotta go potty!" over the monitor. It gets louder & louder until you take her to the bathroom. (or the "mom, I'm done sleeping. Mom, I'm done sleeping. MOM!, I'M DONE SLEEPING!" to which by that point, so am I. ugh

[Hetha]

I'm drooling. You are SO LUCKY. Dude.

[No Mother Earth]

Man, I thought you were talking about the Boy until I read that she got up and peed by herself. I don't think that will ever happen with the Boy. He'll be wearing a diaper at 13 - all 10lbs of it.

[Sus @ Wiggle Rooms]

Well done for your short if illustrious reign. The underclass in our dictatorship revolted immediately upon being taken out of crib prison, and have fully and thoroughly infiltrated our castle every night since. Power to the people can go a little far.

[CC]

THAT ROCKS!!!! Wish my kids did it more often.